How to deal with big changes in your life

Most adults resist change because sometimes change brings a lot of unknowns. Even exciting changes cause a level of anxiety and possibly even turmoil as we try to adjust to the newness of the situation. First, it is important to acknowledge that change is difficult, and we must allow ourselves to feel a bit of apprehension. Next, we need to take steps to ease into the newness of changes in our life. Here are some ideas to help you navigate through the journey of change, and to also build resilience in the process.

Connect with Others

Make a point to connect with others. Relationships with close family members, friends or others can serve as a "scaffolding" of support when we are experiencing changes in our life.

Accept Help from Others

Accepting help from others is sometimes difficult, and you might be tempted to resist offers of support from those who care about you. However, when you surround yourself with those who care and will listen to you, your level of strengthen and resilience grows.

Network and Serve

Sometimes change is due to trauma or extreme challenges beyond our control. Some people find that being active in civic groups, faith-based organizations, or other local groups provides social support and can help with reclaiming hope. Assisting others in their time of need also can benefit the helper.

Shift Your Perspective

It is important to avoid seeing crises as insurmountable. You might feel as if you are expected to climb the highest mountain under the worst of circumstances. You can't change the fact that highly stressful events happen, but you can change how you interpret and respond to these events. Many people assume the challenge will never resolve, and that they will never find peace. Try looking beyond the present to how future circumstances may be a little better. Note any subtle ways in which you might already feel somewhat better as you deal with difficult situations.

Change Is Normal

Accept that change is a part of living. You may have had a perfect plan for your life, but the changes and challenges you now face may have altered or cancelled out your perfect plan. Certain goals may no longer be attainable as a result of adverse situations. Accepting circumstances that cannot be changed can help you focus on circumstances that you can alter. Identify the good things you do have, and identify goals you could still achieve and begin to focus on those aspects of your future.

Keep Moving Forward

It is ok to pause to take a deep breath, and even spend some time taking a break from your normal pace of life. However, it is important to move toward your goals. Develop some realistic goals. Do something regularly — even if it seems like a small accomplishment — that enables you to move toward your goals. Instead of focusing on tasks that seem unachievable, ask yourself, "What's one thing I know I can accomplish today that helps me move in the direction I want to go?"

Many people who have experienced tragedies and hardship have reported better relationships, greater sense of strength even while feeling vulnerable, increased sense of self-worth, a more developed spirituality and heightened appreciation for life.

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